Xenes, (Oi) Thyliko Ousiastiko Plythintikou Kalesmatos, (On the case of filia*)

Initial (b)Log Entry from a night


"O thriamvos tou tritou enikou" G.I.Mbambasakis, 1996, Biblio Symvanton kai Anaforon

"...(T)o tell your story as it is, in pieces" Walter Benjamin, 1929, One Way Street

"And everything, then, 'begins' with 'citation'" Robert Smith, 1995, Derrida and Autobiography


"I can't go on. I will go on.". Den mporouse na synehisei, tha synehize. Zeitouse, zita, tin adeia sas na synehisei, na synehize. En tou tritou enikou, eos tritou prosopou to anagnosma, oso ki an touto, to pio kato, den leinete, ha!, den anikei, den einai tou tritou ma tou protou, pou (panta), os prosopo, ana-(t)horei.
Ki amesos tha skeftei, skeftete, ta matia, ta kokkina matia tis allis, ta ygra matia ekeinis, sto kryo, ta prasinogalaza-grey matia matia ekeinis, palia, ta xera, skoura matia tis, oute kan prosexe to hroma, ton 'iridismo' ton mation tis ekeinis, oute kan, opos, kai dioti, pote den tin eide mera, proi, opos tote, pou den evlepe kanena to proi, kanena zontano, 'alive', to proi.
Efthase, sto gnosto semio, sto gnosto kafeneio, pinontas, pinontas apo prin, aftes tis meres, me to 'na daktylo 'en argeia', pinontas, pinontas krasi, kai BOOOOM, kai xana BOOOOOOM! kai xana, xana, BOOOOOOOOM!!, kai meta synehise, na pinei diladi, meta ta BOOOOOOOOM!!!, synehise na pinei whiskey, Irlandeziko diladi, whiskey, kai oi filoi tou, ah! oi filoi tou den fenontan pouthena, alloi allou kai alloi s'alla bar, kai ekeinos gia ena mikro, mikro, poly mikro hroniko diastima, stin Christou Vournazou, sto 11, kai VOURRR! tin Leoforo kai meta, prota, palia, prin kontosouvli, eno tora, diladi pio prosfata, koutsomoures, horta, karafaki, k.t.l., gia ligo, me ta kokkina matia ekeinis, pou meta asprisan, asprisan Thee mou!, kai den evlepan, gia ligo, afou oi filoi tou alloi allou kai alloi s'alla bar, me tin myrodia tou, to hnoto kai to stoma tou, opos kai tora, na vroma whiksey, Irlandeziko whiskey, 'Black Bush' - 'Justelene', eskaze to soundtrack, oh! yeah!- kai meta, pio arga, prin ligo Jameson's, me nero, PANTA me nero, oh! yes!- me to teleftaio tou gevma, kai to teleftaio tou tour, kai zita, na zita, ekeinos, o tou tritou enikou, isos na xanakousei opos palia, opos xana ekeino to heimona, pano kato ta idia kila, pano kato opos tora, diladi, ta idia kila, kai monos, otan parelave, ekeino to cd, tin mousiki, pou tora zitouse, 'mia adeia mpotilia dipla sto krevvati, einai o monos mas syggenis', opos zitouse, m' erotimitikotita, me "paramythia kai paravoles".

Edo, meta, idi me to new soundtrack, me to neo soundtrack, en hombre solo, ehontas paixei ola ta hartia tou, encarte, ma ehontas, idi, pia, apo tote, tote pou ta dika tou matia den evlepan, tote pou den evlepan para mono -oh!- tecquila, ehontas apo tote diladi, 'pou jairos!', anakalypsei pos i trapoula pote den teleionei, pos pote den paizeis, pote kaneis den paizei, pote den epaixe, oute kan o idios pou olo mila gia to paihnidi, ma pote den epaixe, toulahiston m'ola ta hartia tou. Ehontas to pligomeno heili pou matonei, simadi kai simenomeno tou to matomeno hartomantilo, pou pses idi, eihe afisei, edo, dipla apo tin zografia tis Lady Diana Beauclerk (nee Spencer) (1734-1808), dipla apo tin ana-paragogi tis zografias, dipla apo tin anaparagogi tou aisthimatos ("oti agapisa m'afinei nikimeno" - to soundtrack, ah! to soundtrack pou ihei sta aftia tou, kai ehei pia ximerosei, kai sto allo bar pou pige, pou ston teleftaio tou vradino peripato, to teleftaio 11, pses, kathe pses, to aionio pses, sto allo bar, i proti protasi tou barman itan "En tha pieei kanenas tipote allo!", kai oi filoi tou, oi alloi, den itan xana ekei, kai eihe zitianefsei, pio prin sto allo bar (nee Spiti) [HA!] "just a few drops", tis pire fisika, kai meta, diladi pio meta, pio meta, prin, akouse to soundtrack, to opoio tora ihei st'aftia tou, pou idei ihouse here [HA! Ishionei o nouros tou shilou?] "Gia nees ites, gia nees syntrives" ihe en-grapsei, en eidei ihous, (t)here, os ena iho apo ena allo soundtrack, mia allis eidikotitas, mias allis periptosis, palia, tote pou akoma taxideve anatolika, nai, yperxe epohi pou taxideve anatolika, tote, diladi, me to idio panta aisthima, dipla tou, opos tora) anaparagogi tou aisthimatos, oste, osan kai i paragogi tou itan pote atofia, itan pote arhiki, itan pote stalmeni, erhotan apo kapou, apo tin pigi kai erre san neraki, piou, aftou, tou tritou enikou, tou tritou enikou, pou diakindinevei xana ton thymo, to menos, ohi mono "i tis christinas i tou pari", ohi, ma diakindinevei kai to menos, ton thymo, to apotravimeno, ana-limeno + ana-liften klironomima tou tis eipe, enas allos tritos enikos, mia alli, to ti periegrapse, en-do-genes os "syngennia", thymizontas tou tous filous tou, tous allous filous tou pou itan allou, "syngenneis" (adynati i yparxi tou monadikou syngenni, tou syngenni tou monou; pio meta, pio meta), eno ekinos, o allo tritos enikos, arkestike, ekeini ti stigmi, tin hronikotita pou osan analampi tin stigmi tou kyndinou, fotize, mera pia, os backlight, tous patous ton potirion tou, ta ametrita mpoukalia, ta simadia, endogenei, tou somatos tou, tous ponokefalous tou, touto edo, (t)here, touto to here, to hroniko to here pou trefei mesa tou tin airesi, tin epi-logi, tin para-logikotita, metaxi praxis kai lexis, diladi, metaxi mias anyparktis, symvatikis asfalisis, mias prosohis kai enos xerou olofotou dromiskou kai mias exisou anyparktis praxis, pou gia tin ora den mporei na milisei, gia tin ora, oute einai tis oras alloste, en tritou enikou to anagnosma, kai edo egkeite kai o archekos 'thriamvos', i moni parea sto perpatima, to periptoma, el hombre solo, "to ixere pos tha symvei mia mera, ekeini i rogmi pou kouvalouse, pligi pou evraze, sipi pou aimoragouse, tha ton thrymatize gia panta pera os pera" alloste gia touto grafei, kai (t)here, gia touto, "Grafontas ekdikoumaste ta pragmata" (Karouzos), den pisteve pos tha apefeuge tin mia mera, pou tin eihe alloste apofygei, "kai ta skylia koitousan dakrysmena, na hanetetai stis nyhtas ton pythmena", o El Consul (tou Lowry), "Giati pineis?" Giatre!, Polyagapimene mou Giatre ma fysika "epeidi mou areskei" pia, panta, "epeidi mou areskei", mesa se touto to agomahito tou fovou, ta ktiria pou to ehoun poleodomisei kai to alkool pou to ana-domei, to meta-domei, einai apo ta liga pragmata pou peremenoun na mou aresoun, opos, kai, panta, ta matia tis, ta matia tis, ta portholes, ta meri tis diatritotas, pou ta kalyptei edo me lexeis, pou ta kalyptei, grigora, grigora, prin parei kaneis eidisi, grigora, grigora se touto ton thoureio, se touto to anagnosma, tou tritou enikou, epana apofevgontas na plirosei fees, foro, dasmo, apofevgontas na kanonisei tous logariasmous tou, etouto itan alloste pou tis eihe pei, kai pses, pou tou eihe pei kai prin, pos arneite oso ki an einai touti i anyparkti asfaleia, s' olofoto dromaki, kata-thesi pou tha kleie tin rogmi tou, m'ant' aftou grafei, diakyndynevontas to menos, oso ki an ta paramythia kai tis paravoles tis akous glykitera, oso ki an honomaste piso apo tis lexeis, kai ta pramata, oso ki an nomizomenei pos pexame - ti ginete, poios ehei valei edo ton plithintiko, ti sto diaolo!- nomizomenos poe epexe - Feuh!- kai nomizomenos pos tha xefygei [mia gia panta] me touta edo, tis lexeis kai ta pramata, pou toso aresan kai stous dyo, kai stous allous dyo, ma kai se keinous, otan itan dyo, pos tha xefygei kai dithen katathetontas ta asfalistra, tou tritou enikou, tha kanonisei tous logariasmous, isos me kati extra gia ta dia-dikastika, eno ekeinos ithele, tin stigmi tou kyndinou, "which is not the exception but the rule", na mporei, mesa po tis lexeis kai ta pramata na kanei "tin praxi adelfi tou oneirou" (Benjamin, kai ta pio pano), en dynamei na diakindinevei, ma emene stis lexeis kai ta pramata tou efevgan, kato apo to sourotiri, BLOOOM, mesa sto potiri, BOOM!, kai plironan tora noiki, ston trito eniko, pou diakyndinevei, pera apo tin plithoriki syngenneia, tin syngenneia ton pente ipiron kai ton 7 (efta) thalason, kai tin diki tou lexi, Giatre! des me, hothika xana! Giatre!, tin diki tou lexi, to "syn-ergatis". Kai ixere kala ti lexi tou, dioti tin lexi tou tin pisteve, oso ki an dyskolevotan stin ekfora tis, oso ki an sto skotadi, den evlepe, mallon gia touto tin empistevotan, dioti, nai christo, tyfla sto methysi, pou pia den mporouse na ginei, ektos spanion katahriseon, kai ektos spanioteron syn-evreseon, perimene tin tehniki tou tyflotita, diladi, tin gymnia tis eikonas, to spinthirisma ton mation tis, (to fylo tou enoikou toutou tou tritou enikou ehei nomizo edo kai ora kathoristei), tin anapnoi tou, tis kiniseis pou itan pia skies, pou itan pia myr-odies, myrioi dromoi kai den itan hristika olofota dromakia, pou tympanokrouun ta kleido-kymvala tis asfalisis, tis pros-ohis, eno o horos tou einai, ohi mono cohe-re i co-here, ma konghi sta pantelonia, koftero lepidi pou, nai matonei, ma kai 'kongxa', diladi, paranoikitita, e-(i)-diki tous, xehorista ka Co, ekei sto skotadi, kai epeidi en skotadi, empisteftike, esto kai agarmpa tin lexi tou, pou den itan alli apo tin apousia tou Ergou, kai tin parousia tou Ergot, tou molysmatikou mikroviou apo to opoio prosvalonte ta threptika demetriaka (Shhhhh! Onomata sto telos), ta psomia diladi, ma kai ta glyka sokolatenia cornflakes, kai pou odigei se gangraina, se kopsimo, pano stin konghi tou trapeziou, tou maheriou,ma kai tou rouhou i tou hartiou, Ergot to loipon me to opoio prosevale, kollouse, stis lexeis, ma ta pramata tou xefevgan dioti synehize na mila me paramythia kai paravoles, ektos eisagogikon, synehizei na mila me paramythia ka paravoles, eikosi tosa hronia 'sou plirono noiki' (to pio palio tou soundtrack einai afto), tha synehize, opos kai synehizei, opos synehize na pinei, kai synehizei, opos tha synehisei, "I can't go on. I will go on.";

*Xana, Once More, o tonos dikos sas.